Muns, Raleigh. "Libraries of TERROR: Are librarians the new secret weapon?"

The Current (University of Missouri-St. Louis) September 19, 2005 (vol. 38, no. 1161), p. 6

 

In addition to being a librarian, I'm also a veteran of the Great Conflict With the Island of Grenada also known as "Operation Urgent Fury" which took place in 1983. As a member of the US Navy at the time (though I saw no action) I'm entitled to join the American Legion, which I have done.  As a bonus, I receive a subscription to the monthly American Legion magazine. In the September, 2005 issue a  commentary entitled "Libraries of TERROR" by Deroy Murdock, naturally caught my attention.

 

According to Murdock, it turns out that libraries are actively aiding and abetting "Islamofascists." He reports that members of the 9/11 terrorists used library internet computers to "surf the web." I've recently learned that one of the hijackers, Mohamed Atta al-Sayed, also drove a Chevy pickup truck. I am planning to write a letter to American Legion magazine informing readers to be on the lookout for Chevy pickups as possible vehicles known to be used by mass murderers. I expect an article entitled "Pickups of TERROR" in an upcoming issue.

 

Also according to Murdock, libraries are "enabling" child molesters. He cites a Decatur Daily News report that pedophiles regularly cut out pictures of children from various publications held by libraries. Sure enough, I found we had huge numbers of  publications in our Ward Barnes Education Library with pictures of non-adults. Though I failed to find even one picture razored out, I did note that many journal and book pages were dog eared and it was obvious that people had been checking these materials out and taking them home.

 

I went to the Dean of Libraries with my new concerns and was gratified to find out that the UMSL Library budget for materials for child molesters is a healthy zero dollars annually, as is our budget for collecting "Islamofascist" materials. Seems that we're wasting tax dollars buying books and journals in the fields of "biochemistry" and "political science" and "computer programming." Go figure.

 

Being an inquiring sort, I used the MERLIN Library Catalog to see if we possibly might have any dangerous and scurrilous materials in our collection. With very little effort I found that UMSL owned: three copies of well known white supremacist Adolf Hitler's Mein Kampf (one of which was written in a foreign language); over 180 works by that known Communist sympathizer, Karl Marx; several books by Karl's relative, Groucho; and 18 books by that master of terror, Stephen King.

 

Not to denigrate library users' concerns about the activities of Grade A Felons in the libraries, let me assure all that we genuinely take such things seriously. The next time I see an "Islamofascist" child molester surfing kiddie porn on library computers, I personally won't hesitate to inform competent authority. Really.

 

What I didn't know before reading "Libraries of TERROR" was that libraries, and UMSL's in particular, were such hotbeds of TERROR. Murdock concludes, "The time for librarians to stop their facilities from doubling as crime dens is long overdue."

 

That's definitely not groovy.

 

 


Email Address: muns@umsl.edu

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